Masculinity - Loyalty Pt 2

 "Jesus said to Simon Peter, 'Simon, son of John, do you love me more than these?' e said to him, 'Yes Lord; you know that I love you.' He said to him, 'Feed my lambs.'" John 21:15

"You stand up for your teammates. Your loyalty is to them. You protect them through good and bad, because they'd do the same for you." Yogi Berra

Yes, you read that correctly, a quote from the great Yogi Berra that actually makes incredible sense. You know the kind, like, " Little League is a good thing because it keeps the parents off the street," or "90% of the game is half mental." Did you know, though, that Yogi was part of the landing force in Normandy? Yogi was part of the naval support in that invasion, and he was wounded in his efforts to pilot his boat to give cover fire for the troops in the landing. He received the Purple Heart. Yogi, it seems, understands loyalty from the John 15 passage, "Greater love has no one than this, that someone should lay down his life for his friends." That sums up faithfulness and loyalty well. Click here for more information on Yogi's service in the war.

So, loyalty on the team means being part of something greater than yourself. We see Jesus asking this of Jesus. Peter, you insist on following me, do you love me more than these? If so, take care of my sheep (people). This is part of the healing process Christ offers Peter after his denial of Christ during his arrest. Peter denied him three times, and in John 21, Christ will press the question three times to confirm Peter's love for Christ. Christ is ultimately showing us loyalty in that His love for us gives us the forgiveness needed for salvation. He forgave as we are to forgive.

So, loyalty means being in service with others for something greater than ourselves. A team that strives for excellence. An organization committed to public good. A church committed to sharing the Good News of Christ and the difference He makes in our lives and the love between the fellowship as a result. So much so that even the great Yogi Berra got it straight, we pray that we do as well as followers of Christ.

Masculinity - Loyalty

 "...For where you go I will go,, and where you lodge I will lodge Your people shall be my people, and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried." Ruth 1:16 - 17

Loyalty is an aspect of masculinity in our culture we seem to value. We love the loyalty of a good pet like my dog Hank, and that extends itself into relationships. He's a loyal friend, we may hear of a person. He's loyal to his church or organization, to his group and to his team.

The "loyal to the team" notion perplexes me because in my life, more often than not, teams have no loyalty to anyone but themselves. Teams move (my Houston Oilers and the then-hated owner Bud Adams moving to Tennessee for example). Don't understand that? Let me drop a name for the Lubbock folks: Chris Beard. How dare he! we heard. Where was the loyalty there? Teams decide to shed payroll and be lousy for a period of time, like the Cincinnati Reds, and the owner recently told the fans angered by years of being bad who considered boycotting the game, "Where are you going to go?" Not to the Cincinnati ballpark apparently.

As we've noted, masculinity is generally a culturally defined aspect of manhood, so to look in scripture for a common definition of that is not easy. Loyalty is equally difficult in many aspects. We can certainly find disloyalty. Adam and Eve with God in the fall. David and Uriah after Bathsheba. Peter and Christ. Judas and Christ. All betrayed God. Disloyal to the person. 

So it is ironic that perhaps one of the best definitions of loyalty occurs in the book of Ruth between Ruth and Naomi. Ruth, a daughter-in-law, is all the family that Naomi has left after losing her husband and two sons. According to Jewish law, nothing bound Ruth to Naomi, and Naomi has asked Ruth to return to her land (Moab). Yet Ruth makes the declaration above to  Naomi that basically declares a bond of loyalty, a love between the two that nothing will break, not law or tradition. The story only gets better for Ruth and Naomi as their relationship grows until at the end of the short book when Ruth has a son, and as Naomi holds the son, we read, "A son has been born to Naomi. They named him Obed. He was the father of Jesse, the father of David." (4:17)

What we know about loyalty in faith is that God has always been faithful and loyal to his people, after the fall in fact. God has always had a plan of salvation that began after the fall and found its way in the unlikeliest of characters, like Ruth and Naomi. That plan of loyalty between God and His people continues today, and like God with us, we are to be with each other. Forgiving, loving, and merciful people of God sharing the gospel with others. As God has done for us, so we do for others.

Masculinity - The Fall of Man

 "Then the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked." Genesis 3:7

The immediate response from eating the fruit of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil was separation from a union of God we cannot understand, but the first physical sign of that separation was awareness and shame. Because of that shame, "...they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths." (3:7b)

The Fall of Man in the garden is one that provides a keen insight on our state in the fallen world: We are now separated from God because of our sinful nature. We are now foreign to God, with whom we were created in His image. The order of creation was also greatly upset: We were created in His image to tend to His creation, and man was created first, then woman.

Men were given the ultimate responsibility to tend to and work the garden with women as a "suitable helper." Today, this kind of conversation gets interfered with by several things: our pride interferes with allowing God to be God; our sin interferes with true masculinity as designed by God in creation; and our relationship with women changed immediately.

The fact is Adam failed when Eve came to him with the fruit. He had simply failed to be there, tending God's creation, including Eve, when Satan came into the Garden. Then he led the charge to hide, go into denial and make excuses. We still fail today on many fronts as men of God. God responds quickly with a promise to resolve our now-foreign nature with Him: "I will put enmity between you (Satan) and the woman, and between your offspring and her offspring; he shall bruise your head and you shall bruise his heel." (3:15)

Ultimately, God will reconcile us through the suffering, death and resurrection of His Son, who overcomes sin, Satan and death. Until that time that Christ returns, we live in His grace and forgiveness for our failures and we receive strength to work toward a better relationship with God through His Spirit.  The problems we see today, and generations before and after us too have or will experience, are because of the fall.  God, however, has redeemed us and those generations before and who have yet to be who believe in His Son Jesus Christ.

We pray that as we focus on our true masculinity, we seek to put that into the perspective of a relationship with God, our Father, through our faith in His Son Jesus Christ, the author and perfecter of our faith.

Masculinity - Men at Work

 "The LORD God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to work it and keep it." Genesis 2:15

I find it interesting that generationally, from my dad's generation (born 1923) through today, our view of work has changed in terms of culture. My dad found work to be a source of pride. It was his identity, and he wasn't alone. He and his co-workers bowled together, made friends and came over to one another's homes, and when my dad described what he did, he would say, "I work at the Houston Packing Company on the killing floor" with pride. (That was a meat plant in Houston FYI.)

The father saw his role as provider in my dad's generation. Work gave income and benefits (the good jobs did). It was associated with his value of who he was as a husband/father to make money to put a roof over his family's head, food on the table and gas in the tank.

Today? Today we segment our work into a perfect little model designed somewhere.  God, Family, Country, Work. If my dad were still around today and heard that come from my mouth, he'd wonder where he went wrong. Work is family and work is country. It's part of what a good husband/father does and what a good citizen does. Interestingly enough, I heard Rabbi Daniel Lapin on Dave Ramsey's "Entreleadership" podcast recently cite Genesis, Exodus (twice) and Joshua from the Hebrew bible, and the four passages he cited (including the above) had the words "work" and "worship" in the Hebrew. Why was it interesting? Because the word is the same word in Hebrew.

God created us to work and to work in service to Him. Yes, but the passage in Genesis is pre-fall of man. After the fall (covered more extensively in a later devotion about "masculinity"), man was cursed to toil. That is true, but three of the four passages are after the fall. Rabbi Lapin cites Exodus 20 where God commands us to "work" for six days and observe the Sabbath with rest the seventh day. It is the same word used in Genesis according to him. The two using "worship" don't translate exactly in the English bible, but Joshua 24:15 (his citation) is, "As for me and my house, we will worship the Lord." (English bible says "serve".)

What does this all mean? It points us to the idea of vocation (calling). Our calling in life is to serve God in all we do, work, family, community, and church. If you find it difficult to see what you do in work as serving God, the idea is to figure out how that work serves God, which starts with service to your God and family.

We can get in ruts at work, but we can in life in general, a condition of our sinful nature and sin-filled world, but we were created TO work in service to God, and in the Christian realm, we work in response to God's sacrifice of His Son to redeem us from our sin. We pray we can see God's Hand in our lives and in our work as a response to the gospel message and to value what we do in service to him.

Masculinity: Father's Day Edition 6.19.22

 "Honor your father and mother, that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your god is giving you." Exodus 20:12

My favorite color when it came to leadership and management in my job as an education administrator was gray. I liked that blur between lines that gave me room to work with staff to come to a decision. What drove me crazy was going to a meeting at central office only to have another principal in the room ask, "Can you tell us how you want us to....?" after doing months of research and creating a broad consensus on an approach to an issue. In my opinion, if you ask a governing group, you will get an answer and chances are you won't like it nearly as much as if given a chance to solve it yourself.

Then I became a dad, and I learned that kids don't respond much to consensus building, months of research, and a common vision for what is best for the family. I learned that they are there to test every facet of every issue or rule established within the household. They didn't seem to respond to the wisdom developed from mine and my wife's 60+ (total at that time) years of experience in life.  I'm probably not alone.

Mark Twain is said to have said, "When I was 14, my dad knew nothing. When I turned 21, I was astonished how much he learned in those seven years."

Even God's command creates a gray area when He says to "honor." Honor is a "know it when you see it" verb. Other words come to mind and I believe we all know it when we see it, but our kids will certainly have questions, much like we did when we were their age. The sting comes at the end of the commandment when it says "our days will be long." So, if I dishonor mom and dad does that mean....?

Yet today, we "honor" the first half of the pairing: Dad. Yet we know that Mom comes first in the calendar with Mothers Day the month before, and you can certainly miss one and not be held nearly as accountable as the other, but Father's Day is one in which we pause to observe the true spiritual importance of Fathers (Dads).

Scripture places the onus of spiritual development on dads, just a plain old truth right there. Just a look at "Father" in an indexed concordance bible or to google "fathers in scripture passages" yields passages like this: "Hear O sons, a father's instruction, and be attentive, that you may gain insight, for I give you good precepts, do not forsake my teaching." Proverbs 4:1 - 2

We love our moms, but dads are meant to be the foundation of faith in the home. I look back and see my own attempts at such and wish I had been better, but I know I'm not alone. So today, we take pause to honor the Dad in each house (and those who've assumed the role as step-dads as well, or mentors to young men without fathers). Fathers shape children in so many ways that another plain old truth is the absence of a father is difficult to overcome (not impossible, but an added difficulty).

Dads, young and old, thank you for all that you do. We pray that God give you an added measure of grace and mercy for all the gray areas children can present us with (Twain didn't have to deal with cars, the cell phone, the internet and other things that have made parenting a 24/7 job). We pray that God provide you with wisdom in your efforts. We also pray that we realize that we are not in this alone, and that there are an abundance of mentors available to talk about issues we may face as parents in our midst.

Have a great Father's Day!

Masculinity: Created in God's Image

 "Then God said, 'Let us make man in our image, after our likeness." Genesis 1:26

When do men know they are men? I've seen the phrase "man card" on Facebook (and maybe used it a time or two) as in, "Time to revoke the man card." So, what are the criteria for the issuance and/or revocation of the same? Where do we go to get one? Who is the governing committee or body?

Interestingly enough, when we go to scripture, we don't get a full answer that says, "Here is what it means to be a man." We have to search scripture in fact to see what God expects of man as well as women, but it is usually in relationship to Him and/or His creation.

Creation is a great place to start, and it is where Dr. Paul Pettit starts in his workbook, "Christ-Centered Masculinity: Becoming the Man God Intends" (2020). As we look at the creation, it is worth noting that God created man to work the garden for God which implies we are unique in creation, the culminating event after creating light, dark, heavens and earth, land and water, creatures to fill all (land, water and skies), and man to tend the garden.  He quotes Thomas Jefferson's observation of being created "in the image of God" by saying, "Humans are a reflection or copy of the divine image, but humans are obviously not divine."

Pettit notes that "Scriptures clearly state God created humanity in two models: male and female," and he notes that the Hebrew clearly distinguishes between man and woman" Beyond that, though, the idea of "masculinity" is "socially constructed and culturally influenced."

So, we were created in God's image to work the garden for God (stewards of His creation), and a female was created from man to be a suitable partner in this arrangement.

How does this initial creation of man impact how we view ourselves as men of God? How does that impact how we view women in our relationship with God and with one another? What are our roles in this life with these things in mind? How does that shape what masculinity is?

We can only pray that God shed light on our awareness of who we are in relationship to Him and our roles in this world with regard to God, His church, and our families and communities. We pray that when we say that there are some things that are "distinctly unique to being a man," that it is scripturally-based, Christ-centered and is God-pleasing.

Masculinity - Shaped or Blame?

 "Joseph said to them, 'Do not fear, for am I in the place of God?' As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good...." Genesis 50:19 - 20    

I have had the privilege of meeting George HW Bush on several occasions.  The first time was after he was defeated by Barbara Jordan for the US Congress in Houston. My mom and I were in a department store in downtown Houston, and when we rounded a corner, there he stood. Tall, wearing a tie and an overcoat (don't ask me why or how I remember that) and looking at items. I went up to him and told him I was sorry he lost (as an eight- or nine-year old). He smiled and shook my hand and said, "We will get them next time."

Indeed he did. He went on to serve, ultimately as president. Interestingly enough, he started his service by lying about his age and getting into the Navy as a pilot. You probably know the story, he was shot down in his Avenger as the pilot and lost two crewmen in the Pacific bombing Chi-chi Jima. I just read the account as recorded by James Bradley who wrote "Flags of Our Fathers." The account is in "Fly Boys" which he wrote later, but he visited the island with Bush after his presidency. Bush steps aside as they walk the island, looks out, and says, "I always felt responsible for them and have always wondered what happened to them." Clearly they were not reported as prisoners and never had their bodies found.

Bush came back and was like other men of that generation, putting the war behind them and serving as fathers, husbands, businessmen and workers. When he got into politics, his war record was never touted as a selling point. It was, in fact, out of reverence to two men who died on his watch, not as a liability on him but rather in honor of their loss and ultimate sacrifice. I saw him at activities after his presidency, sometimes up close and in person (shook his had at the marathon in 2000 and again as he followed Fred Couples at the Houston Open). He clearly made his mark. What does Bush teach us about masculinity?

Like Joseph in Genesis, he teaches us to proceed with life. You know Joseph's story. Brat of a little brother, Jacob's favorite in they eyes of his older brothers, sold into slavery and put in and out of jail in Egypt and then in and out of pharaoh's  court in between. The above passage at the start of the devotion is the climax of a lifetime in Egypt when he finally confronts his brothers about the path they set him on. "God meant it for good."

Part of our masculine nature is to continue in the battle and move forward, to keep our eyes on the goals set before us. "...Forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead. I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus." Philippians 3:13-14

What happens to us either shapes us or enslaves us to a lifetime of blame. Our mind should be set on the prize set before us, to learn of God's call in our own lives, and to pray that God help us in our effort to be men who make a difference in our families, communities, church, work, and other places in which we are visible.

(Loosely based on the book by Tony Evans, "No More Excuses: Be the Man God Made You to Be." 2017. Ch 1 - "No More Hiding from the Past")

Masculinity - What Is the Source of Our Strength?

"Then Saul clothed David with his armor. He put a helmet of bronze on his head and clothed him with a coat of mail, and David strapped his sword over his armor. And he tried in vain to go, for he had not tested them. The David said to Saul, 'I cannot go with these for I have not tested them.' So David put them off." 1 Samuel 17:38 - 39

When I was a kid, my dad was my image of manhood. Tall and strong, thick wrists, veteran of the Great War, a provider, and a good friend, he was to me as a child, nothing short of a hero. Dad would never have put his own armor on me to go fight a man's battle. I know for a fact he would have pushed me aside and said, "Here, let a man do this." Saul, a warrior king, is sending in a boy to do a man's job. In almost a cowardly and guilty move, he suits up David in his own armor. Imagine your own baseball or football team, desperate to win, sending in a 14-year-old boy in the uniform of the greatest player of the team in order to defeat the much-feared opponent. The stands would erupt in laughter, the other side jeering and taunting, as the kid drags a jersey that fits well past his hands to take the mound or the field.  

We use this familiar passage used before as the first in a series of devotions on "masculinity." True masculinity.  What does it look like?  What is its source? How does a truly masculine man behave, think, act, teach, lead, follow and do a host of other things? In truth, what shapes us like Saul attempted to shape David before the battle?

Masculinity is a phrase that gets bantied about all the time. In some circles, masculinity is a bad word, made worse by descriptors or adjectives like "toxic" or "archaic." Masculinity, as a counter, from other circles, is a good word because what's wrong with the world is men have been emasculated and stripped of manhood and had feminine qualities placed on them as expectations. Both kinds of thinking are a reaction to a perception or an experience. It is almost exclusively a western culture conversation and phenomenon.

What is our source of our source of information that frames our ideas on masculinity?  David was clearly masculine in the passage where he encounters Goliath. He feared nothing, but he respected the task. He sought permission to go and do what the men around him would not do, confront Goliath. He didn't enter the contest defiantly or arrogantly.  David attributes the source of his strength to God when he says, "The Lord who delivered me from the paw of the lion and from the paw of the bear will deliver me from the hand of this Philistine." (v37) Saul, the king and lead warrior of Israel, says almost to his relief, "Go, and the Lord be with you!" When it came to Saul, who was clearly no longer in favor with God, David was reverent, when he may have rightfully said, "King, you stood and did nothing. Let a boy go and do a man's job."

David is very Christ-like in this passage. Christ, too, will take on sin, Satan and death (a much more significant "Goliath"). We will seek insight into the idea of masculinity as we go to scripture, Like David, we seek God's will in who we are as men, what that means, and how that impacts our behavior. We pray for insight from the Spirit into scripture to discern God's will as men of God.