When Mike Matheny retired from professional baseball after 13 (?) years as a catcher, he went home to seek that next phase of life. A group of parents, quick to see he was available, sought him as the coach of their children's team. After some deliberation, mostly within his own mind, he wrote a letter that became known as "The Matheny Manifesto" which went viral on the internet. His contention, as he writes in his book by the same name (mentioned yesterday and cited as well for full credit), is that "youth sports are screwed up and parents are 100% to blame." (p 38) With that in mind, he set out to establish the framework by which he would coach and they would support as parents of children who are kids and there to play, learn about life, and maybe, one day, just maybe, play at higher levels.
Strong words. Perhaps some of you reading this winced at the thought and are parents with kids in youth sports. I won't support, defend, or deny Matheny's assertions. What I will do is ask us what kind of parents we want to be? The truth is the new generation of people who are current parents have a certain reputation: "helicopter parents," known to be over-protective and zealous in filling their child's time with activity, and to be present at all activities, and to assure that no scratch, harm (physical or emotional), or meal come to the child that won't be counter to anything the parent is philosophically, morally, or ethically opposed to.
Unfortunately, it doesn't take much to create myth. Look at the 1960s. The Boomer Generation, born to the Greatest Generation, has a reputation for creating a culture that was permissive at best, and really a generation bent on not following rules, creating new rules which were questionable, producing a counter culture that didn't respect societal norms, etc. etc. All this born to the generation that cured diseases, conquered enemies who had amassed great power, and then went on to create the space program and other feats not seen in the history of mankind.
So, what kind of parents were they, were we, and are you? The truth is we don't know until the children become adults, and then we see how they turned out. Do they make it in spite of us or because of us?
I hope all of us know the following: we aren't perfect; we don't have all the answers; we should seek answers from people you consider wise; pray in earnest for wisdom, strength and patience; seek guidance from scripture; and pray to God for guidance. In John 9, Christ is asked by teachers about a blind man, "Who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?" Many times we take on that assumption. My children are like this because I did or didn't do something. Christ answers, "It is not that this man sinned, or his parents, but that the works of God might be displayed in him." (9:2 - 3)
We pray that our children are examples of Christ and that our workmanship as parents is in Christ's honor and glory. We pray for that measure of forgiveness when we fail and that we can forgive ourselves as well as the children when they are not at their best. We pray that in spite of it all, God create a new being in our children that walks in faith in His light.
Hope Men's Ministry
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