Masculinity - Shaped or Blame?

 "Joseph said to them, 'Do not fear, for am I in the place of God?' As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good...." Genesis 50:19 - 20    

I have had the privilege of meeting George HW Bush on several occasions.  The first time was after he was defeated by Barbara Jordan for the US Congress in Houston. My mom and I were in a department store in downtown Houston, and when we rounded a corner, there he stood. Tall, wearing a tie and an overcoat (don't ask me why or how I remember that) and looking at items. I went up to him and told him I was sorry he lost (as an eight- or nine-year old). He smiled and shook my hand and said, "We will get them next time."

Indeed he did. He went on to serve, ultimately as president. Interestingly enough, he started his service by lying about his age and getting into the Navy as a pilot. You probably know the story, he was shot down in his Avenger as the pilot and lost two crewmen in the Pacific bombing Chi-chi Jima. I just read the account as recorded by James Bradley who wrote "Flags of Our Fathers." The account is in "Fly Boys" which he wrote later, but he visited the island with Bush after his presidency. Bush steps aside as they walk the island, looks out, and says, "I always felt responsible for them and have always wondered what happened to them." Clearly they were not reported as prisoners and never had their bodies found.

Bush came back and was like other men of that generation, putting the war behind them and serving as fathers, husbands, businessmen and workers. When he got into politics, his war record was never touted as a selling point. It was, in fact, out of reverence to two men who died on his watch, not as a liability on him but rather in honor of their loss and ultimate sacrifice. I saw him at activities after his presidency, sometimes up close and in person (shook his had at the marathon in 2000 and again as he followed Fred Couples at the Houston Open). He clearly made his mark. What does Bush teach us about masculinity?

Like Joseph in Genesis, he teaches us to proceed with life. You know Joseph's story. Brat of a little brother, Jacob's favorite in they eyes of his older brothers, sold into slavery and put in and out of jail in Egypt and then in and out of pharaoh's  court in between. The above passage at the start of the devotion is the climax of a lifetime in Egypt when he finally confronts his brothers about the path they set him on. "God meant it for good."

Part of our masculine nature is to continue in the battle and move forward, to keep our eyes on the goals set before us. "...Forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead. I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus." Philippians 3:13-14

What happens to us either shapes us or enslaves us to a lifetime of blame. Our mind should be set on the prize set before us, to learn of God's call in our own lives, and to pray that God help us in our effort to be men who make a difference in our families, communities, church, work, and other places in which we are visible.

(Loosely based on the book by Tony Evans, "No More Excuses: Be the Man God Made You to Be." 2017. Ch 1 - "No More Hiding from the Past")

Masculinity - What Is the Source of Our Strength?

"Then Saul clothed David with his armor. He put a helmet of bronze on his head and clothed him with a coat of mail, and David strapped his sword over his armor. And he tried in vain to go, for he had not tested them. The David said to Saul, 'I cannot go with these for I have not tested them.' So David put them off." 1 Samuel 17:38 - 39

When I was a kid, my dad was my image of manhood. Tall and strong, thick wrists, veteran of the Great War, a provider, and a good friend, he was to me as a child, nothing short of a hero. Dad would never have put his own armor on me to go fight a man's battle. I know for a fact he would have pushed me aside and said, "Here, let a man do this." Saul, a warrior king, is sending in a boy to do a man's job. In almost a cowardly and guilty move, he suits up David in his own armor. Imagine your own baseball or football team, desperate to win, sending in a 14-year-old boy in the uniform of the greatest player of the team in order to defeat the much-feared opponent. The stands would erupt in laughter, the other side jeering and taunting, as the kid drags a jersey that fits well past his hands to take the mound or the field.  

We use this familiar passage used before as the first in a series of devotions on "masculinity." True masculinity.  What does it look like?  What is its source? How does a truly masculine man behave, think, act, teach, lead, follow and do a host of other things? In truth, what shapes us like Saul attempted to shape David before the battle?

Masculinity is a phrase that gets bantied about all the time. In some circles, masculinity is a bad word, made worse by descriptors or adjectives like "toxic" or "archaic." Masculinity, as a counter, from other circles, is a good word because what's wrong with the world is men have been emasculated and stripped of manhood and had feminine qualities placed on them as expectations. Both kinds of thinking are a reaction to a perception or an experience. It is almost exclusively a western culture conversation and phenomenon.

What is our source of our source of information that frames our ideas on masculinity?  David was clearly masculine in the passage where he encounters Goliath. He feared nothing, but he respected the task. He sought permission to go and do what the men around him would not do, confront Goliath. He didn't enter the contest defiantly or arrogantly.  David attributes the source of his strength to God when he says, "The Lord who delivered me from the paw of the lion and from the paw of the bear will deliver me from the hand of this Philistine." (v37) Saul, the king and lead warrior of Israel, says almost to his relief, "Go, and the Lord be with you!" When it came to Saul, who was clearly no longer in favor with God, David was reverent, when he may have rightfully said, "King, you stood and did nothing. Let a boy go and do a man's job."

David is very Christ-like in this passage. Christ, too, will take on sin, Satan and death (a much more significant "Goliath"). We will seek insight into the idea of masculinity as we go to scripture, Like David, we seek God's will in who we are as men, what that means, and how that impacts our behavior. We pray for insight from the Spirit into scripture to discern God's will as men of God.

Ash Wednesday 2021

 "If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us.  If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." 1 John 1:9

"Have mercy on me, O God, according to your steadfast love; according to your abundant mercy blot out my transgressions. Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin!  For I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me. Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight.... Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me. Cast me not away from your presence, and take not your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me that joy of your salvation and uphold me with a willing spirit." Psalm 51:1 - 4; 10 - 12

Prayer: Heavenly Father, We know that You love your creation and forgives all the sins of those who seek Your forgiveness. Create in us and make us new, contrite in our hearts, that we confess our sins and misdeeds, and seek our forgiveness in the name of Your Son, Jesus Christ. Be merciful to us, O Lord, and we pray that we grow in our love and trust in You.  In Christ's name, Amen.

Devotion 2.15.21

 "Why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother's eye." Matthew 7:3 - 5

Christ is fairly clear, yet we seem to forget this familiar passage. Who is the "scoundrel" of the day? What's he or she done? I'm sure if you are asked this, a person's name can come up quickly.  I know it can for me.  Maybe not a big name either, but someone who has done something I've taken exception to that I might protest in my mind. I might even believe he or she has sinned against me and want to take my case to people (ignoring Matthew 18)

How do we so often forget that?  How do we forget our own state of sin and maybe even forget that no one's state of sin is any less or any greater than another's? "Yeah, but at least I never..." may be the refrain.  In Matthew, we hear Christ's words in the "Sermon on the Mount." Chapter Seven is part of a larger message early in Christ's ministry.  Christ expands the definition of sin for those who may have thought they escaped the actual physical act and are not guilty.  Murder, adultery and others went from the physical act to passions of the heart.  Hate, anger, lust are all equal to the sin.  We measure the sin of the world like the pharisees, pointing out legalistically how the world is in a sad state, forgetting our sinful nature is contributing to it as well.

This Lent, beginning Ash Wednesday, will be a period of reflection and repentance.  It is only through the cross that we see Christ take on the magnitude of the sin of this world (past, present and future) and through His resurrection that we receive the unmerited and undeserved salvation, even for a scoundrel like me.

We pray the eyes are opened and the logs are removed.  We pray for a world in hurt and that those in despair turn to that same cross and resurrection that brings us the peace and salvation needed today.

Devotion 2.15.21

"I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace." Ephesians 4:2 - 3

Just as Paul says in 1 Corinthians, "I do it all for the sake of the gospel, that I may share with them in its blessing." (9:22) So we see in Ephesians the simple message, "Do you want to be right, or do you want to be effective? Do you want to make a difference?"

To be right requires a certain amount of confidence, but it can also be based on a certain amount of arrogance.  I don't like being wrong.  Personally I don't know of too many who do (or if I've ever met anyone who doesn't like being wrong for that matter), but to walk with God and the message of salvation requires a certain measure of humility, asking, "What's more important right now?" Isaiah 42:3 says it this way, "A bruised reed he will not break...."

Andy Reid said it well in the post-game interview Sunday.  As you may or may not know, just days before the Super Bowl, a wreck came at his son's hands that critically injured a child and injured others as well.  So, he went into the game with that weighing on him.  By the end of the game, he had the suffocating loss weighing on him as well, but he said this: "First, my heart goes out to everyone involved in that crash. My heart bleeds for those who were injured, especially severely.  As to the game, we made plans the previous week for the game, but the accident was about humanity, the game was football.  As for the loss, it's on me.  I didn't make the necessary plans for the game in terms of the offensive line and didn't make adjustments during the game.  That's on me." 

Now I'm paraphrasing his words in quotes, but that is the essence of his message. My interpretation of it was this: The wreck was tragic. The game was football. The two are separate, but the wreck and the lives of the injured and their families are more important than the game. As to the game and the team, it's on me.  I bear responsibility for the loss." As I sat and listened, I thought, "Now THAT is being a real man.  Humility in a time of loss in both instances.  Bearing the responsibility for the weight of a game that was one-sided and owning it."  Football is a team sport (as is most of life), so imagine the temptation to invoke that fact during the course of the post-game interview.  "Hey, we all didn't belly up to the bar today." Reid could have said that, but in humility and gentleness, he raised the conversation to other matters that were truly more important (life and death), put the issue in perspective (it's a game), and took responsibility (it's on me).

He could have spoken convincingly, but he chose the path Paul has for us in his letter.  For his team and as an example to us, he sought to "maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace." That's what it means to be a man seeking to make a difference over being right.  That's what it means to be a man as God would have us be - bearing responsibility for our actions over taking credit. 

I pray that in similar circumstances, I share my light of the grace of God over the notion of winning for the sake of winning, or even winning when I might be right, to allow humility and gentleness to win the day for the sake of the gospel.

Devotion 2.8.21

 "Do you not know that in a race all runners run, but only one receives a prize? So, run that you may obtain it. Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable. So, I do not run aimlessly; I do not box as one beating the air. But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I should be disqualified." 1 Corinthians 9:24-27

As you read this, you already know the outcome of the Super Bowl, so to replay the game would be redundant. Today (Sunday), I drove back from Fredericksburg, TX and was thinking about the upcoming game, wondering who would win.  As was noted in a previous devotion using the passage above, the players, including the two marquee players - Brady and Mahomes - was a matchup of a lifetime on paper given the degree to which they train, the command both have of the game, and the discipline they use to execute their respective games.

So, in mid-drive, I called a buddy who had just left church, and he noted the great job our pastor did in a pinch.  Seems as though the one who was going to deliver the sermon today (Sunday) was ill and had to call in and say, "Can't do it today." My friend said, that the pastor had really used a line that packed a punch, so to speak from the analogy Paul uses in the passage.  So, I queued up the service on Facebook and listened. 

The pastor elaborated on the passage above as the Epistle lesson selected for today (Sunday), but about mid-way through, he asked this, "Do you want to be right, or do you want to be effective?" Prior to verses 24 - 27 in 1 Corinthians, Paul informs us of his efforts to be "all things," that is to a Jew, he spoke as a Jew, to the non-Jew, he spoke as a non-Jew, to the weak, he became weak. He does this for "the sake of the gospel." (v 23)

That takes the same mental toughness exhibited by our players in the big game, as Paul later analogizes. I maintain my focus, foresaking the desire to be right, on the gospel message of Christ Jesus.  

I might add that rather than seek to be right, seek to make a difference (be effective). I can only speak for myself when it comes to this, but I see it all across the social media universe (including my own clutter).  Pick the issue, and too often I choose to slap or slap back. So what does my "lust to vindicate myself" (Augustine quote) do to my ability to minister when the time comes?

Pastor noted the ways to combat this by taking in what Paul says: Train myself to exercise self-control; pray for the Spirit's guidance; and maintain the focus of the gospel message.

This is spiritual excellence and to develop it and maintain it requires the same training and discipline exhibited by those we watch today (Sunday). We pray for that excellence in our daily lives and that we train and focus ourselves for the sake of the gospel.

Devotion 2.4.21

 "Is not wisdom found among the aged? Does not life bring understanding?" Job  12:12

Tom Brady, 43 years old, brings with him plenty of experience.  He has experience in terms of years played, but he also has experience in terms of Super Bowl experience (10 including this year) and wins (6 so far). He was the one steady in Belichick's (head coach of New England) roster until this year, and his absence saw New England go 7 - 9.  He was new to Tampa Bay's roster this year with head coach Bruce Arians.  Early on, Tampa Bay and Brady struggled, and Arians response was to criticize Brady publicly at press conferences.  Brady never replied or defended himself, and clearly Brady worked through it, taking Tampa Bay to a Super Bowl and Arians to his first as head coach.

Arians should have counted the rings on Brady's fingers and compared them to the rings on his fingers before he spoke.  New offense and new formation with only one familiar face, Rob Gronkowski (former New England tight end), were to blame for the sluggish start.  People at first blamed Brady's age (like 260 years in dog's age), but he overcame that.  Now, there is really one big reason for the trip to the Super Bowl - Tom Brady.

Brady brings skill, poise and wisdom to the game. What could beat Patrick Mahome? Not the head coach.  Kansas City wins in that category.  Not Patrick Mahomes' lack of skill, poise and ability to execute. The only thing that could beat Kansas City and Patrick Mahomes is Tom Brady.  Brady has pulled off upsets before, including a comeback against Seattle that I turned off and went to bed on, only to wake up and read the sports' headline on ESPN the next morning saying, "Tom Brady, MVP." He can lead a slow drive and keep Mahomes off the field.  He can put just enough points on the board to win.  Defense may be able to slow Mahomes, but offense keeps the clock running and the other offense off the field.  To it all, Brady brings the biggest factor:  Wisdom.

In a culture that is focused on youth, we tend to forget the wisdom around us in terms of people who've been there, done that.  Maybe I should say it this way, in a culture that worships youth, we tend to ignore the wisdom that is around us. I used to correct the phrase in education, "We believe the children are our future" with this, "No, we are their future." But we hear it all the time in terms of lives centering on children with youth activities, even in the church.  In fact, in our zeal to make sure our children don't miss out, we even forsake church for youth activities.  Youth has been the biggest factor listed in the call in our own congregation with the current and previous pastor.

I love children.  Have two of my own. Said the same thing when they were teens - need a youth group that is vibrant and active.  Yet when scripture speaks to wisdom, as it often does, it never centers on the wisdom of youth.  Job speaks to that.  Scripture, however, goes further on wisdom and is not compromising on the definition:  "To know wisdom and instruction, to understand words of insight, to receive instruction, justice, and equity; to give prudence to the simple, knowledge and discretion to the youth. Let the wise hear and increase in learning, and the one who understand obtain guidance, and to understand a proverb and a saying, the words of the wise and their riddles. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction." Proverbs 1:1 - 7

Fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge.  Fools despise wisdom and instruction.  We are here to guide the youth and provide knowledge and discretion.  Powerful words from Solomon, who himself asked for wisdom when God would have given him anything.  We pray for knowledge and discernment as we seek to learn and gain wisdom.  We ask that we pass that wisdom on to the next generation and the generation after that.  We pray that we appreciate the wisdom from those in our midst with experience who exhibit wisdom and understanding.